I guess we only have anecdotal evidence to go on here, but except for exactly one case I've always seen the organizations I work for get and wait for a positive response to their request before they display our logo. Does everyone else's experience really differ on this?

I have had exactly the same experience in my previous (and in my current) startup. I would never add the logo of a client without their consent. (maybe some don't follow that logic)

You aren't thinking like a growth hacker.