I think this is great. One thing I would emphasize more heavily is that your objection was not to the problems, your objection was to the insurmountable barriers to fixing them.
Every organization has problems, that's why they hired a new senior developer. If someone read the OP to me in an interview, I'd be sympathetic but I would also be thinking "what if our CICD setup doesn't resemble the seminal book? We've reinvented the wheel once or twice too. Will they help us improve or leave in disgust?"
So I would include specific examples of what you tried to do:
"I sent a polite email to headquarters, I created a demo using open source libraries, I tried to work within the meetings culture and scheduled one of my own to talk about the situation."
Every organization has problems, that's why they hired a new senior developer. If someone read the OP to me in an interview, I'd be sympathetic but I would also be thinking "what if our CICD setup doesn't resemble the seminal book? We've reinvented the wheel once or twice too. Will they help us improve or leave in disgust?"
So I would include specific examples of what you tried to do:
"I sent a polite email to headquarters, I created a demo using open source libraries, I tried to work within the meetings culture and scheduled one of my own to talk about the situation."