Do you really find many women without college degrees that reject you over not having a college degree? I'd guess the problem is more the sheer number of women that get degrees - look at almost any subpar liberal arts college and you'll find an out of whack gender ratio. Those degrees really should not confer any legitimate social status, but unfortunately because they check the college box they sort of do.
I'm not doubting your experience, I'm just saying I don't think it is hypocritical in the way you're implying. A lot of women, especially in coastal cities, have a degree. So they think their dating pool should be people with degrees. It's not rooted in double standard, they are just severely overestimating the value of their degree.
And at the core, the reason a lot of women get such shit degrees is that other options like various trades are not as accessible for them. There are a lot of reasons for that - it's a complicated issue that I don't think can be boiled down to just misogyny or just misandry (or just both for that matter).
Personally, this is not my issue. I have a smartass degree from a reputable target school that makes everyone assume I must be a genius. That said - I meet a lot of women with masters or PhDs who look down on my woeful bachelors. (Ignoring I’ve had 7-fig jobs - SF is hellishly annoying on this)
I just know men who have had this issue and I have a lot of compassion for them.
Usual articles out there these days are like, “women are outnumbering men in college education. Men turning to other forms to get ahead. Women suffer.”
And I think you’re really overestimating the rationality of most women on coastal cities - I’ve been married to one. She knows how many double standards she and all her friends have. She’s astutely aware but she’s like, “is what it is! I’m not changing!” And that’s how most women I meet also are. “Double standards are okay for me but not for thee…”
We’ll get there someday but it’s not happening anytime soon. Idk why anyone here is all agro with the downvotes. Do none of you talk to single women under 35?
I agree I don't understand why your post was so heavily downvoted. I actually upvoted it just because it seemed excessively downvoted.
The impact of college degree on dating scene is interesting to me and it's a unique discussion topic instead of rehashing the same stupid circle jerk HN always has about college.
I don't think the described dating behavior is unique to women though, that's probably why some people reacted negatively to the post as it does come across kind of bitter.
Sure in the exact details women might be judgemental/hypocritical about different things than guys are. And yes in this particular post women's behavior is probably more relevant. But have you talked dating with single dudes under 35?
They're by and large complete bums around the house even when the woman is the higher earner at work, talk about double standards. Doing group swiping I've heard plenty of comments on women's looks from guys that were pretty subpar looking themselves. And so on.
People are frequently shitty. Sometimes in fairly gender-specific ways, but being an asshole in the dating world is overall pretty universal. Apps like Tinder aren't helping either.
I'm not doubting your experience, I'm just saying I don't think it is hypocritical in the way you're implying. A lot of women, especially in coastal cities, have a degree. So they think their dating pool should be people with degrees. It's not rooted in double standard, they are just severely overestimating the value of their degree.
And at the core, the reason a lot of women get such shit degrees is that other options like various trades are not as accessible for them. There are a lot of reasons for that - it's a complicated issue that I don't think can be boiled down to just misogyny or just misandry (or just both for that matter).