I think the key aspect to overcoming losses resetting Baseline expectations though that you can move forward without overwhelming sorrow and regret.

I think the interesting question is if this is possible in a objective way. A lot of people that I've met rationalize dramatic experience and loss with the idea that it made them who they are, and is there for a net positive. I've heard this from people after suffering lifelong injury or acquiring permanent disease like AIDS.

It seems difficult to accept that it is water under the bridge without rationalizing that it was necessary. I guess from a deterministic point of view, maybe it was